You guys!? Look at his little spots! Look at his tufted ears!
At ThinkGeek HQ we generally don't endorse buying pets (we prefer adoption). Wild animals like ocelots are not pets. QED, it would be okay to buy an ocelot. No wait. That's not right. It would NOT be okay to buy an ocelot. NOT. You hear us? Get back here.
Ocelots are native to south Texas. Ocelots. Who knew? If T-Shirt Girl had known she certainly would have spent more time on the lookout while living in San Antonio. The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service estimates there are fewer than 50 ocelots left in the wild, so they've established an Ocelot Recovery Team. We want that on our business cards. "Ocelot Recovery Team." It sounds like a secret agency. "Somebody prep the Ocelot Recovery Team for an airdrop." Maybe it's part of ISIS. Anyhow, the Ocelot Recovery Team takes on tasks like building safe ocelot-crossing sites beneath highways (imagine a crosswalk sign in the silhouette of a cat) and arranging date nights with ocelots from Mexico to expand the tiny population's genetic diversity. Ocelots do not need liquor, guns, or ping pong paddles to make that happen. But Babou says it couldn't hurt.
An ocelot with the nametag "Babou", guarding a rocks glass and lounging on a red ping pong paddle with one paw on a Walther, graces the front of this cardinal red, 100% cotton t-shirt.