One Does Not Simply Telnet into Mordor
They won't give us the port number.
Actually, we suspect there are a bunch of MUDs out there that would disagree with this statement. For instance, we initially thought we weren't going to be able to simply Telnet into mordormud.net, but then we realized it was a firewall issue. Oops.
One does not simply Telnet into Mordor. Really, you should SSH in if you don't want the Nazgul watching your every move. No, okay. You can't SSH in either. You can't use any of the other app layer client-server protocols. Trust us. We tried. So much for using a remote shell to reboot the Eye of Sauron. Man, I hope the eyeball server team picks up their on-call phone, cause I do not want to walk there. Wait. What? Why not?
"One does not simply Telnet into Mordor." in white ink on a black, 100% cotton t-shirt.