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The ThinkGeek Newsletter!

May 16, 2007


We had to tear ourselves away from concurrent marathon sessions of looking at lolcats to bring you this fine email chock full of goodies, so it had better be a good one. Seriously though, our spare time has been spent getting ready for the upcoming holiday. We've got our kabobs n burgers, lots of "cold ones", and lump charcoal ready to fire up and celebrate. No, not Memorial Day... it's TOWEL DAY! You heard it folks, May 25th is Towel Day and we hope you're all prepared, towel in hand, to celebrate our old pal Douglas Adams. We don't think gifts for yourself are out of the question for this holiday, so read on for some neat stuff you can gift to the most important person in your life: YOU!

Clocky Robotic Alarm


Zzzzz...huh, wha? #@$%!! Come back here!

Sleep is the little death, and dying kinda sucks, so we avoid it whenever possible. Problem is, if you don't sleep, you tend to pass out an inopportune times, like driving, operating heavy droids, and various sex type behaviors. Thankfully, unplanned narcolepsy can be avoided by a strict regimen of planned sleep. Don't let sleep take you over though; too much means no work done! You need a boot to the butt to wake you up, and Clocky is here with said metaphorical boot! Clocky's robotic wheels propel this little alarm off your nightstand, spinning away from your grasp. Turning and spinning, it forces you out of bed to chase down this adorable noisy demon, making you instantly alert and ready to face the day.

Checkout the Clocky right here:

What's New @ ThinkGeek !!

R/C Star Wars R2-D2 Action Figure - Mini Droid Arrives from Japan

R/C Star Wars R2-D2 Action Figure - Mini Droid Arrives from Japan

This R/C R2-D2 Action Figure is like a Star Wars fanboy's dream come true. The size of a regular action figure, this tiny droid is fully controllable from the included lightsaber remote. Authentic R2-D2 sounds, rotating head and red LED eye complete the package. No more playing with your old skool Star Wars figures by shaking them and talking in a funny voice, this is the real deal... and we don't kid when it come to Star Wars. We would have killed for this little R2 gem as a kid and it's still pretty damn cool as an adult.

Grilliput Compact Grill - Maximum grilling, minimum size

We're not entirely sure but we think that the first grill was invented by the ancient geeks. Cooking over an open fire worked but the grill was a big step forward and gave these geek cavemen some well deserved street cred. This paved the way for other advances like the wheel and rudimentary versions of the traditional cookout that we now know as tailgating. We think that you, being modern day geeks, will certainly appreciate the Grilliput Compact Grill. Capable of cranking out a quick burger or some tasty kabobs in just about any location, this grill folds up into a tiny package for maximum portability. Made from stainless steel, it features an optional Compact Firebowl perfect for holding your fire or charcoal.

Grilliput Compact Grill - Maximum grilling, minimum size

R/C Forklift - Desktop Workhorse

R/C Forklift - Desktop Workhorse

Tiny robots to do our bidding - that's what everybody wants. The problem is, once we've got an army of enslaved machines, the chances of our eventual overthrow and extermination increase significantly. So say we all. The way to avoid armageddon is to keep the brains in your hands. This tiny R/C Forklift's control mechanism lies in your hands. You have control. You have the power. Maybe it's not big enough to move an entire pallet of tylium ore, but a can of highly caffeinated beverage is most certainly within your power to translocate. By your command.

Magic Censored Numbers ... Don't Blame Us If You Have to go Naked

When your security has been compromised, it's generally not a good idea to run around yelling about it (unless you're open source and you can enlist the masses to assist you in your fight). Apparently the folks at AACS-LA missed the memo. Enshrine that glorious moment of flailing as lawyers attempted to control the Internet. Legal notice: Copyright laws differ. Although we don't have the "magic number" printed on this shirt, wearing it may cause AACS-LA to send you a Cease and Desist. In that case, please remove your shirt immediately. Thank you for your cooperation.

Magic Censored Numbers ... Don't Blame Us If You Have to go Naked

Micro R/C Storm Launcher - Easy Enough for a Monkey

Micro R/C Storm Launcher - Easy Enough for a Monkey

Hard-to-fly fragile R/C toys are just no fun for the robotic monkeys at ThinkGeek... the monkeys are not so dexterous and get pretty pissed when their pricey R/C gadget crashes and breaks on the first flight. That's why we were really stoked when we tried out the Micro R/C Storm Launcher. This rugged little outdoor plane can skim along the ground or take to the clouds. With forgiving flying characteristics and plenty of power you'll be zipping around your yard and dive-bombing your cat in no-time. Durable EPP foam construction means no cringing when you let the monkeys have a turn.

USB Turntable - Set Your Old Vinyl Free... for Only $99.99

It's a sad life being an outdated media format like the vinyl record. Don't let your vinyl die a slow an lonely death moldering in your basement for years. Liberate it digitally with the Ion USB Turntable. Simply plug this high-quality turntable into the USB port on your PC (Windows or Mac) and use the included Audacity software to rip your vinyl directly to MP3 (or WAV format) for playback on all your newfangled devices like the iPod. Now your vinyl can fade away happily knowing It's brain has been transplanted digitally into the future. If only it were so easy for all of us.

USB Turntable - Set Your Old Vinyl Free... for Only $99.99

Gimmie a Gaggle of Japanese Goodies

Gimmie a Gaggle of Japanese Goodies

Adorn your cellphone with the mysterious (but harmless we assume) Japanese Luminous Mushrooms while you assemble your oh-so-kewl retro style Dot-S Legend of Zelda Pixel Diorama... make Link, Zelda, or your choice of other 8-bit pixel art. Next, give your plush Mario Sound Bops a good sound bopping. Your choice of Brick Block or Goomba. Each makes appropriate game sounds when hit. More Mario sound effect fun can be had from the New Super Mario Sound Drop. Each keychain plays a different digitized sound from New Super Mario Bros. with a button press. The Super Mario Solar Mushroom sits in your window and bops back and forth when exposed to sunlight. Finally the fully-functional Mario Bros. USB Mouse comes in either Mario or Star varieties and brings some pixel-based bling to your desk. Whew.... Mama Mia!

Hydrodynamic Deluxe Building Set - Fluid dynamics are fun

Humans have been studying fluid and fluid dynamics ever since the first person peed. In a move referred to by hydrodynamicists as "Adam's Tinkle", five people moved out of the way of the stream of liquid and the field of hydrodynamics was born. It's a fascinating subject and we've finally found a hydrodynamic kit worthy to be offered to you on our site. This kit comes with 300 pieces, an electric pump, and some cool building suggestions - but the real challenge is to design and build your own hydrodynamic plant. With water flowing, valves timed just right, and a variety of tanks and meters, this kit becomes the wettest office fun your legal department will allow. We built an ice cream factory first and now we're working on a distillation plant (wink, wink!)

Hydrodynamic Deluxe Building Set - Fluid dynamics are fun

USB Doomsday Device Hub - Push the button...if you dare

USB Doomsday Device Hub - Push the button...if you dare

Some dead dude once said, "Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts absolutely." But you know what corrupts even more than absolute power? Anonymous power. It's true, and there are many psychological experiments to back this up. And what better way to explore anonymous power than this wicked USB Hub. Sure it has four USB ports in the back, but the fun comes with its evil looking red button of doom. It is protected by a plastic cover and a three stage failsafe mechanism. It will only work if armed in a very specific (and sequentially numbered) procedure. Once armed, you need only to push the red button to unleash anonymous doom. What really happens? We don't know. But that won't stop us from pushing it. Again and again and again. AH, the POWER!!!

Tangle DNA Speakers - A new twist on desk speakers

DNA is special - you all know that. It's twisty, tastes like grape sherbet, and is responsible for all life as we know it. But what more can we glean from DNA's sublime curves? Probably a lot of stuff, but what we really want to do is to twist it in our hands - you know, for fun. Lucky we found these Tangle DNA Speakers! Each speaker head is supported by a fun, bendy, helix shape, which means you can position your DNA Speakers into almost any configuration. And since they run on batteries or AC Power, the DNA Speakers are great for traveling with any MP3 player or sitting on your desk as unique computer speakers. The DNA Speakers are as fluid as the music you listen to - bend them to fit your tunes.

Tangle DNA Speakers - A new twist on desk speakers

Robots, the future, and how to gesture in Japanese

Robots, the future, and how to gesture in Japanese

The future will hold many wonders: robot servants, flying cars, jetpacks...hey, wait a minute! If we trusted movies and TV, we'd have all those things by now. Robots are improving, especially in Japan where they're working on laws to protect mankind from our upcoming robot attendants. Worse case scenario of the future? We never get jetpacks or flying cars and sentient robots take over the world. This would be bad. But don't worry - books will save us! Where's My Jetpack will show us what technology we're missing; How to Survive a Robot Uprising will teach us how to stay alive; and 70 Japanese Gestures will get us talking to our Japanese friends, even if we don't know their language. Because the only way we'll win the war against the machines is to stick together with our friends.

Quick Blurbs !!

42 Utility Towel

42 Towel - May 25th Is Towel Day! Yay!!


Lots Of Quality Geek Shirts - On Sale, Cheap

QuikPod Pro Handheld Tripod

QuikPod Pro Handheld Tripod

eStarling 2.0 Wi-Fi Photo Frame

eStarling 2.0 Wi-Fi Photo Frame - New Improved Model Available

Crayola Executive Pen

Crayola Executive Pens - Whimsical Writers

Prank Memo Sticky Notes

Prank Memo Sticky Notes - Instant office pandemonium

Travel UV Toothbrush Sanitizer

Travel UV Toothbrush Sanitizer - Clean the bugs off!

Build Your Own Stonehenge Kit

Build Your Own Stonehenge Kit - Great for office druids


Q-Man - A bendy little guy with magnetic hands and feet

USB Squid

USB Squid - Turn one USB port into four, Squid Style


Javapops - Each gourmet treat has 60mg of caffeine

TWIT Personal Area Network Performance Polo

TWIT Personal Area Network performance Polo

Atomic Food Containers

Atomic Food Containers - For A Toxic Office Environment

Time Projecting Red Laser Pointer

Time Projecting Red Laser Pointer

USB Digital Microscope

USB Digital Microscope - Back in stock!

Video Watch with OLED Screen

Video Watch with OLED Screen - Back in stock

R/C Daleks

R/C Daleks - BACK in stock

Chargers Chocolate Espresso Beans

Chargers Chocolate Espress Beans - Yum

R/C Spy Video Car with Night Vision

R/C Spy Video Car w/Night Vision - Back in stock

Nabaztag Wifi Smart Rabbit

The ThinkGeek Clearance Section - Cool stuff cheap

Dear Timmy

Our mascot and resident sage, Timmy the Monkey is a fountain of wisdom. Here he shares his advice with a smart mass in need. Would you like Timmy's helpful advice for yourself? Send it to Dear Timmy. If we publish your email to Timmy, you will win a $50 ThinkGeek Gift Certificate! Read on for Timmy's latest wise words:

Dear Timmy,

Why does Tokyo not have anti-godzilla defenses installed by now? They should have them running round the clock!

Katy, Texas, USA, Earth, Alternate Dimension (A)

Dear Jeff,

This has long been a sore point within the Japanese government. The LDP maintained for many years that the enormous cost associated with anti-Godzilla defenses made them untenable, while the SDP (at that time still known as the JSP) countered that the LDP was attempting to put a price on the lives of Tokyoans (or Tokyoites, or whatever they are called). Of course, the problem is that the primary base of the LDP, which has been in power in the Japanese legislative branch since 1955, is the rural farmer, who is rarely impacted directly when Tokyo is destroyed. And the power of the populist SDP has waned considerably. The primary opposition party now is the DPJ, who is only recently beginning to take up the cry against Godzilla.

For a brief time in the early seventies, there was actually a "No Gojira Party", but it gained little following; despite the ravages of Godzilla, as well as Gigan, Hedora, and Mechagodzilla, Tokyo actually was not destroyed between 1975 and 1984 (sometimes known as "The Quiet Monster Times"), so the NGP lost favor.

In the late eighties, after the return of Godzilla and a few more devastations of Japan's capital city, some attempt at anti-Godzilla measures were actually begun. Unfortunately, they were destroyed by Godzilla in 1989 when he was fighting that giant mutated rosebush or whatever that was. There was another attempt to revitalize the project in the early nineties, but these results were destroyed by King Ghidrah in 1991. After that Tokyo was being destroyed once a year until 1995 or so, so they eventually just gave up.

Recently there has been much talk of bringing back the concept of defense networks against Godzilla and other rampaging monsters, but surprisingly the concepts don't usually get off the ground before being killed in committee. Some political analysts have surmised that the residents of Tokyo are just used to being destroyed by now and see it as inevitable.

Hope that answers your question!

-- Timmy

Submit your own Dear Timmy for simian enlightenment and a chance to win a $50 TG Gift Certificate.

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Last month's ThinkGeek Techie Haiku Winner is: Derek, from Hoboken, New Jersey!
Here is the winning Haiku:

    The Mac hates popcorn
    I dropped some on the keyboard
    It kernel panicked

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