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The ThinkGeek Newsletter!

January 24, 2007


Welcome to the first ThinkGeek Newsletter in the 7th year of the 21st century. As we note this momentous occasion, during this the 3rd millennium, we must ask ourselves a very simple question. Where is all the technology promised to us by Science Fiction? Sure we have cell phones, Web 2.0 and USB ashtrays, but where are the flying cars, surgical nano-bots, and vacations to the moon? Arrrgh! Somebody please build a better spray cheese already! For now, you may seek solace knowing that the loyal bots at ThinkGeek scour the known universe to find you the latest and greatest stuff like...

Love is in the Ozone! Happy Valentines Day!
Take a deep breath. Smell that? No, it's not the acrid smell of air pollution and bird flu, it's love! Love is in the ozone folks, and gifts are highly recommended if you want to keep your significant other's heart in the right place. Call it luck or just uncanny timing, but we just happen to have a selection of Valentine's Day gifts that you simply won't find in any other single place. From a chocolate molecule t-shirt to a blood-type testing kit to check your true compatibility, the perfect gift is just a click (or so) away.

Gift ideas to keep him or her happy:
Valentine's Day Gift Guide. Check out the cool stuff!

What's New @ ThinkGeek !!

Firefly Mini R/C Helicopter - Super stable indoor insectoid

Ok... you caught us. We've been spending too much time cruising this insect-like mini helicopter all around the office and not much time with essentials like lunch and bathroom breaks. Who can blame us really? This tiny helicopter is one precision piece of aviation engineering, perfect for airborne cubicle exploration. With a bit of practice you can launch the Firefly Mini R/C Helicopter from the palm of your hand, have it circle your desk and land on your file cabinet. Fly it down the hallway and watch your co-workers gape in amazement.

Firefly Mini R/C Helicopter - Super stable indoor insectoid

DIY Blood Type Testing Kit - Your blood type is just a prick away!

DIY Blood Type Testing Kit - Your blood type is just a prick away!

The heart is always the symbol of Valentine's Day. But being as we are free thinkers here, we decided to let our minds push the envelope a little. What is more basic than the heart? Blood! So, in the spirit of the St. Valentine's Day Massacre, let the blood flow and learn your blood type in the process! This is a cool little DIY kit which you can do at home (no mailing or waiting for results) in about 2 minutes. Everything is included in the kit, except four drops of water and four drops of blood. You can get the water from the tap...but the blood comes from your finger. Makes a great V-day gift:

Laser Stars Projector - 'My God...it's full of stars...

Tear down those cheap glow-in-the-dark star stickers you bought from the local science store in the mall. There is a new kid in town -- The Laser Stars Projector from ThinkGeek. It does what you might think; it projects thousands of little green laser stars onto your walls and ceilings, but it also projects gaseous dark blue clouds. It's like an instant portable Universe generator. And it almost must be seen in person to believe. How does it work, you might be pondering? Using a state of the art Diode Pumped, Solid State (DPSS) green laser combined with custom developed multiphase diffractive holographic optics, super luminous diodes and precision motors - that's how. Check out this amazing gadget right here:

Laser Stars Projector - 'My God...it's full of stars...

Portable Temperature Data Logger

Portable Temperature Data Logger

Us technical folk certainly have a soft spot for data and even better, graphs of data. And by data we mean measurements of a scientific nature, not the kind of data that is spewed forth by marketing droids to show that people who breathe also tend to enjoy sleep and food (wow, amazing.) The Portable Temperature Data Logger can record up to 52,000 measurement samples of temperature, in user selectable intervals ranging from 1 second to 12 hours. The unit can then be connected to your computer via USB for retrieving and graphing the data using the included software. Ahh, we like.

ThinkGeek launches 4 new tees - madness ensues

Know a little special somebody who enjoys Chocolate? Then we have the perfect V-day gift for your female friend, geek or otherwise - the ThinkGeek Chocolate Molecule Babydoll. All the fun and none of the guilt. Next up is one of our new personal favorites. It's a shirt for those whose motto is: 'If it aint' broke, take it apart and fix it'. If you identify, you'll want to pick up our 'I void warranties' shirt. The 3rd shirt we are launching pays simple homage, with Valentine Day's flair, to one of Earth's most powerful programming languages, C. It simply states, #include . Last up is a tribute to the army of lonely bloggers out there, spilling their guts out to a vast void of user opinion. And it goes something like this...'Blogito, ergo Sum'. With a little Comments(0) blurb beneath of course. Check out the latest threads right here:

 ThinkGeek launches 4 new tees - madness ensues

Star Wars Mos Eisley Cantina Bookends - 3D Evidence of the First Shooter

Star Wars Mos Eisley Cantina Bookends - 3D Evidence of the First Shooter

There is no easy way to say it (and we hope we don't offend our Rodian readers) but Greedo is a punk. If you've only seen the movies, well, you know he gets his green backside handed to him by everyone's favorite rogue: Han Solo. But if you've delved into the "expanded universe" of Star Wars, you know his life was hard. He was born with a need for fighting in his blood and scrapped his way all over the galaxy. Embarrassed at a young age as he tried to steal from the Millennium Falcon, he vowed revenge against Solo. And how did he get that revenge? By dying all over Han's nachos (an extended scene which was cut from the original movie). These bookends celebrate the last few seconds of Greedo's life, which, if you really think about it, are the most memorable anyway.

Valentine's Day Talking Tapes - The voices in your head love you.

Plastic has many uses. From surrounding your favorite gaming system to building your Cosplay armor, plastic is your friend. But has plastic ever talked to you? Well, now it's okay to admit it. Talking Tapes are based on one of Thomas Edison's patents from the early 1900's. They are strips of red plastic. That's it. But stick one end in your mouth and run your finger nail down the bumpy end and you will hear them speak inside your head! Tape one end to a cup, balloon, empty box, or other resonator and you can share their messages with the world! We've assembled 5 phrases perfect for Valentine's Day. Four messages of love and one message of, well, let's just say you won't need it unless you really screw something up big time.

 Valentine's Day Talking Tapes - The voices in your head love you.

Lava Lamp Night Light - Adds a bit of "groovy" to any room.

Lava Lamp Night Light - Adds a bit of

Ladies and gentles, this is the trip you've been waiting for. Plug it into any wall outlet and turn it on. As the warmth of the bulb heats the wax, it will begin to dance and groove in its oil world. Time to sip some Bawls, settle in, and let caffeine and the power of chaos take your mind to new heights. Stare hard, my far out compadres, and you will be whisked away to another dimension. A land where rocking horse people eat marshmallow pies. A place full of love and wisdom and sweet smelling music. You won't notice the work piling up in your inbox or your angry boss yelling at you again. No, you will be one with the cosmic light of what is and what was and what may be. And you will smile the smile of the soul of the universe. Peace.

USB Turntable - Set Your Old Vinyl Free... Digitally

It's a sad life being an outdated media format like the vinyl record. Don't let your vinyl die a slow and lonely death moldering in your basement for years. Liberate it digitally with the Numark USB Turntable. Simply plug this high-quality turntable into the USB port on your PC (Windows or Mac) and use the included Audacity software to rip your vinyl directly to MP3 (or WAV format) for playback on all your newfangled devices like the iPod. Now your vinyl can fade away happily knowing its' brain has been transplanted digitally into the future. If only it were so easy for all of us.

USB Turntable - Set Your Old Vinyl Free... Digitally

Retro LOVE books - Love and kissing, 1930's style.

 Retro LOVE books - Love and kissing, 1930's style.

Romance is not an easy task; it's an art form. It takes years of training and practice on such things as pillows and mirrors to become a master. Luckily for all of us, we have found two books written by an expert in the field of love. From the types of kissing to how and when to hold hands, these books cover every aspect of amour. At least they did to students of love back in the 1930's. Now, they are so tame, kissing your pillow is more spicy. But boy are they funny. When one chapter in "How to Make Love" is entitled "Gee! You're a Swell Kid," you just know the juicy play by play techniques that will follow. You won't learn anything a ten year old doesn't already know, but you sure will have a lot of laughs. Share them with that special someone...and they might work after all. ;)

USBCell Rechargeable Batteries

Rechargeables are great! Besides the hippie environmentalist aspect of them, the idea of having power cells you can imbue with watts just seems cool. The problem with rechargeables, though, is having to lug around that big bulky recharger. Plus, look at your power-strip - see any open slots? No? Fear not, young padawan. The USBCell rechargeable batteries not only recharge via USB, but they've got the recharger built right in! Flip the top of the cathode off, and jam it into an available USB socket. A few hours later, and you've got 1300mAH of juice per battery. Sweet! Life just got a little bit simpler, and a whole lot cooler.

USBCell Rechargeable Batteries

Sonic Boom Love Clock with Bed Shaker

Sonic Boom Love Clock with Bed Shaker

You've finally scored a date with that cute blonde in IT (ok, we know you haven't, so substitute "virtual elven marriage in your favorite MMORPG" for "date with cute blond") and the last thing you want to do is show up late. Also, we know how loud you snore. Let go of your fears as you set your Sonic Boom Love Clock. With a 113 decibel alarm (a jackhammer is about 100) and a bed shaker unit (which shakes your bed, duh!) the only way you'll oversleep is if you are dead. If you are dead, unless you have an active social death, this clock is not for you. And hey, if you ever do snag a real date, you can turn off the audible alarm and just leave the bed shaker unit rumbling. A little smooth jazz, some LED candles, some grog, and you are ready for the time of your life.

Black Cyclone Pistol - Long Range Cubicle Weapon

Here at ThinkGeek when it comes to cubicle warfare we choose our weapons carefully. Company policy requires every employee to have a personal arsenal at the ready (you never know what dangers you might face when trying to deliver those TPS reports). That's why we were pretty stoked to attack our unsuspecting co-workers with this cool little Black Cyclone Pistol. Wind up the propeller-based projectile and pull the trigger to shoot. You get an amazingly accurate shot that whizzes across the room up to 60 feet. Buy two and gift one to a co-worker for some friendly duels to the death.

Black Cyclone Pistol - Long Range Cubicle Weapon

Lightmare LED Watch

Lightmare LED Watch

We're not sure if we've ever experienced a lightmare - perhaps that's the one where giant three-legged LEDs roam the earth devouring lithium cell batteries like Ritz crackers and do battle against an army of autonomous flying blue lasers. Or perhaps a lightmare is just an unusual name for an unusual watch - we confess that we really don't know. The Lightmare LED Watch has 29 LEDs, with a set of four LEDs at the center which represent the single minutes between each of the five-minute increments and two small dots at the bottom denote AM or PM. Stainless steel case and polyurethane rubber strap.

Scrolling LED License Plate Frame

Any self respecting geek should have their favorite gaming console, OS affiliation, and most beloved prime number scrolling neatly under their license plate in glowing blue LEDs. Luckily for you, ThinkGeek has this fine Scrolling LED License Plate Frame to satisfy your high-tech road-based communication needs. Way better than the one your car dealer stuck you with... this aluminum alloy frame is rust proof and sports a scrolling LED display on the bottom. You can program the frame with up to 5 different 120 character messages of your choice, then quickly flip through them using the included IR remote. It's more effective than giving the finger... and way cooler.

Scrolling LED License Plate Frame

Quick Blurbs !!

42 Utility Towel

The 42 Utility Towel - Mostly Harmless

Giant Plush Microbes

Plush Microbes - Rabies, Mange & Heartworm available

Video Watch with OLED Screen

2BG Video OLED Watch - Back in stock!

LED Flashing Sweetheart Kit

LED Flashing Sweetheart Kit - Back in Stock!

Penny Arcade Birds are Weird Poster

Penny Arcade - Birds are Weird Poster

The Cyclopedia

The Cyclopedia - Over 200,000 facts and 1,000 illustrations

Jolt Mints

Jolt Mints - 5 Mints equals the caffeine of one cup of coffee

Super Mario Bros. Plush Keychains

Super Mario Bros. Plush Keychains from Japan

Mini X-Flyer R/C Bi-Plane

Mini X-Flyer R/C Bi-Plane - Back in Stock

Rosendahl Alarm Clock

Rosendahl Alarm Clock

All-in-one Atomic Time Watch

All-in-one Atomic Time Watch - Back in stock

Flexible Shaft Ratcheting Screwdriver

Flexible Shaft Ratcheting Screwdriver - Back in stock!

Dear Timmy

Our mascot and resident sage, Timmy the Monkey is a fountain of wisdom. Here he shares his advice with a smart mass in need. Would you like Timmy's helpful advice for yourself? Send it to Dear Timmy. If we publish your email to Timmy, you will win a $50 ThinkGeek Gift Certificate! Read on for Timmy's latest wise words:

Dear Timmy,

If Kryptonite is indestructible, why did Planet Kryton blow up?

Just curious.

Madisonville, Wisconsin, USA, Earth

Dear Joey,

Thanks for your question!

This is a common misconception. The planet Krypton was not in fact composed of kryptonite. Rather, all surviving chunks of Krypton were turned _into_ kryptonite by the nuclear chain reaction that destroyed the planet. If you think about it, this has to be true. Kryptonite is fatal to Kryptonians given sufficient exposure (well, green kryptonite is, anyway). If Krypton had been composed of kryptonite, all the Kryptonians would have died before they could even be born, and only if one of them had gotten out and spun the planet around backwards could they have ever even made it to the point where they could blow up. Which they couldn't do anyway, because their sun was red. So obviously Krypton wasn't composed of kryptonite.

Besides, kryptonite isn't magnetic like Uber Orbs, so obviously it isn't as cool, indestructible or not.

-- Timmy

Submit your own Dear Timmy for simian enlightenment and a chance to win a $50 TG Gift Certificate.

Current Action Shot Winner

Current Action Shot Winner: Magnify some Pi

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Action Shot Winner!
Techie Haiku Winner!

Submit Your Techie Haiku, Win $50!

Last month's ThinkGeek Techie Haiku Winner is: Patrick, from Waterloo Canada!
Here is the winning Haiku:

    hunger engulfs me
    ready my divine weapon
    titanium spork

Wanna win a $50 ThinkGeek gift certificate? Just send us your original HAIKU and each newsletter we'll select one winner and print his/her HAIKU right here on the next ThinkGeek newsletter installment for all to see, plus we'll send you a $50 ThinkGeek gift certificate. Get creative! More details and rules? Visit:


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