We know it's wrong, but we're here for the crashes.

It's everybody's favorite HTTP code: the 500 error: The server encountered an unexpected condition which prevented it from fulfilling the request. The server can tell you something bad happened, but it doesn't know what. You gotta guess.

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We know it's wrong, but we're here for the crashes.

Sometimes working on the server side of IT feels like you're part of a pit crew. You're expected to keep everything running smoothly with minimum downtime. That requires you to monitor conditions so you can anticipate and diagnose problems. You probably carry a bunch of tools with you at all times (just once we would like to take an air hammer to a rack), and it's best if you wear clothes you don't mind messing up, because nobody knows what you might have to climb under or over to fix something.

Of course, not all server errors can be solved with a sharp thwack. (Many user problems can be, though.) There's very little similarity between your typical .htaccess file and your stock car. And you're very infrequently going to run out of space in a race car or be thwarted by an unresponsive database. Fixing config files. Tweaking permissions. Not much of an analogy there. But you still have the same goal as that pit crew in the end.

It's all about getting it back up and running. How pretty the fix is? Doesn't matter. You can make it pretty later in a scheduled maintenance window. All that matters now is that your customers can go in circles at high speed, because, let's face it, that's what the corporate world is all about.

"Error 500 Internal Service Error Maintenance Crew" in red and white with a checkered flag on a black, babydoll (fitted) shirt.

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