Be Patient Zero

  • Spread the Common Cold or E. Coli without guilt
  • Squishy microbes have a really gross texture
  • Stretchy cord lets you send them flying with sound effects
  • Read more...

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Be Patient Zero



The worst part about working in an office when somebody infects us all with a horrible cold. Someone decided that something just had to be done in the office rather than at home and then they sneezed and coughed their disgusting phlegmy sneezes and coughs all over the place. "But I'm feeling better!" they say. "You should have heard me yesterday," they laugh. NOT FUNNY. GO HOME BEFORE YOU INFECT US ALL!

These toys are our way of having a bit of fun with something that is not fun at all. Airborne Microbes Screaming Diseases are disgustingly squishy giant microbes. Words do not describe the way these feel. They're utterly gross. But that's not all. Each microbe also has a stretchy cord that you can use to send it flying across the office at your least favorite coworker. As it flies, it will make disturbing noises, sure to make anyone eating at their desk reconsider that habit. But beware, once you've sent a Screaming Disease flying, more and more will end up in your office and you'll be a target, too. Get your hands on some Airborne Microbes Screaming Diseases because being Patient Zero has never been so much fun.

Product Specifications

  • Have fun with infectious diseases in your office
  • Spread the Common Cold or E. Coli without guilt
  • Squishy microbes have a really gross texture
  • Stretchy cord lets you send them flying
  • As they fly, they make disgusting (and appropriate) noises
  • Choose:
    • E. Coli (brown and hairy lookin')
    • Common Cold (snot-colored)

Airborne Microbes Screaming Diseases Video:

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