Willow: There's a Slayer handbook?
Buffy: Wait. Handbook? What handbook? How come I don't have a handbook?
Willow: Is there a t-shirt, too? Cause that would be cool....

-- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "What's My Line, Part Two"

The economy's rough. You may be thinking of relocation. Some of the real-estate deals out there, though, really are too good to be true. Before you jump on that adorable 2-bedroom with garage in a suburb of Sunnydale, heed our warning: don't move to someplace next to a fault line, an active volcano (see "fault line"), or a Hellmouth. "Gorgeous views of the crater" do not a backyard make. Plus you won't have a lot of neighbors since the Scooby Gang managed to evacuate everybody before the throwdown with First Evil. Because they're awesome that way. We heart the whole gang, but we especially heart Buffy.

Why's there a stake through the heart? Good question. We're of the "stake first, ask questions later" mentality. If the recipient of the pointy end is a vampire, then voila. Dust to dust. If the recipient is a human, well, they can do open-heart surgery or something and stick everything back together. Or so we hear. Modern medicine. *golf clap*

I Heart (with a stake through it) Buffy is writ large (in Buffyfont) across the front of this 100% cotton, black t-shirt.