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The ThinkGeek Newsletter!
April 23, 2008
Dear Fellow Sacs of Protoplasm (and assorted nucleotides),
Last time we wrote, we unleashed a flurry of tantalizing products upon
you. And as expected, the best of you called us out for our
shenanigans. But many of you did not, and were fooled on the first of
April. You wrote us pained e-mails when you realized that such things
as caffeinated children's cereal and a Nintendo pee game weren't even
vaporware. You said fun stuff like 'We hates You', 'Why ThinkGeek? Why?',
and one of our new favorites, 'I will avenge the honor you just stole
from me'. But we're here to make it up to you by introducing the
following bona fide, genuine, indubitably-tangible goodies...
Dueling Space Marines Copters
The Few, the Proud, the Space Marines
Everyone knows that Space Marines are the toughest fighters this side
of the Quark Nebula... but equip them with blasters and helipacks, and
you've got something deadly enough to take out an alien queen with no
power-loader required. This Dueling Space Marines Copter Set gets you a
set of two mini r/c helicopters with infra-red laser-tag-style battle
action. Simply push the shoulder button on the remote to unleash a
plasma blast and blow your opponent out of the sky. With stable flying
characteristics and forgiving crash dynamics, these diminutive space
copters are perfect practice for that impending battle against the
betentacled alien planet hopper that awaits when you level up.
Create your own epic space battle without the zero gravity baggage:
What's New @ ThinkGeek !!
Fabled Optimus Maximus Keyboard has Arrived!
Time to take out that second mortgage on your home. With the singing of
angels, the fabled Optimus Maximus Keyboard has descended from Russian
design studio Art Lebedev like a deus ex machina. As you should know by
now, this amazing keyboard features a tiny screen on each key... that's
113 screens in all. Of course all this futuristic technology is going
to cost you a pretty penny, but we figure you'll just expense the
Optimus and tout its "incredible increased efficiency when using
PowerPoint hotkeys" in your expense report summary. We did.
Wacky Office Supplies - Finally, Useful Paper Products
Offices are full of paper (some even just make paper). Most of the
paper is crap; let's be honest. So here are some great paper goods to
make the crap more fun and palatable. Whether you need to mark a
document as "Someday," organize your takeout menus, send a paper e-
mail, consolidate your passwords, keep track of your scheduled breaks,
or just carry things around, these office goodies will give you the
attitude you need to succeed. Or the attitude to just mock everything;
we're not sure which.
Stargate Mirror - See yourself in the event-horizon
Untold ages ago, the Ancients built a network of Stargates throughout
our local group of galaxies. 39 glyphs and 9 chevrons on these massive
rings can dial up nearly 2 trillion possible destinations. Normally
these rings are massive - 22 feet wide, and were made from some
previously unknown substance. ThinkGeek's got a hold of a convenient
shrunken version merely 10 inches across. It won't exactly let you zip
through thousands of light-years in an instant, but it works great as a
mirror! Perfect for the narcissistic Stargate SG-1 and Atlantis fan!
2 New Standard Shirts + 2 New Babydolls = 4TW!
This week two of our shirts are out of this world, but we'll start off
with the two that are a bit closer to home. First, we have an iPhone-
inspired Slide to Unlock babydoll and a clone-themed shirt (no federal
funding was used in the making of this shirt). For our out-of-this-
world set, the Planet Express Babydoll celebrates everyone's favorite
intergalactic shipping company, and Cantina Band... well, you'll have
to see that one for yourself.
Third Hand Adjustable Parts Holder - Oh yeah!!
Having an actual third hand would probably make you the world's best
gamer, but it would also look a bit odd. Instead, we suggest The Third
Hand Adjustable Parts Holder. It might not be quite as incredible as
having an actual third hand, but it's still very useful and always
ready to assist. Two adjustable arms with alligator clip jaws hold
parts in place and the magnifying lens is perfect for getting a
detailed view. Great for holding circuitboards when performing
soldering or doing precision repairs or assembly.
Uberstix - A Building Toy Revolution
If you thought you knew all about building sets, well, UberStix are
about to rock your world. Like most building sets, UberStix can build
bridges and towers (the big set uses blueprints instead of instructions
to build a tower over 5 feet tall!), but UberStix really excel when
motion is required. You'll be able to build anything from an UberBoat
(which actually floats) to an UberPult (which actually pults). And
UberStix connect to Lego blocks and most other building sets, too. What
are you waiting for? Get building now.
Doctor Who Laser Screwdriver - The Master's Tool
All legendary heroes require equally legendary villains. And if those
heroes have any gadgets, then you better believe the villains are going
to try and one up them. Thus is the case with Doctor Who. When the good
Doctor whipped out his tool, the Master whipped out his own. Not only
is the Master's Laser Screwdriver longer, it's also gold and silver. It
can "fire" a high intensity laser beam, or age its target rapidly using
a condensed genetic manipulator. Of course, this one is just a
replica... or is it?
HYMini Portable Power Generator - Go Green Go
Juice-Up your electronic toys with green power. You're a geek, you have
gadgets, and they all need electricity. You're also an intelligent and
responsible citizen of the Earth. How do you balance your need for
blinking lights, buttons and dials with the desire to leave less of a
carbon footprint? Simply make use of the abundant energy all around you
for free! This handy power-gadget generates up to 1200mAh of power from
the wind. Boost your power generation with optional solar panels!
Attach the generator to your body or to your handlebars to juice-up
while you move. Cloudy day with no wind? You can also charge off the
Help Keep the Cassette Tape Alive
In between the beloved LP record and the now familiar CD, there was
another music media format - the cassette tape. It was very popular
during the 80's and one thing that definitely made it standout was
that, unlike a LP, you could easily record onto a cassette tape. The
Stand Alone or Car Cassette MP3 Player is built into a standard
cassette tape, letting you use it as either a uniquely old-school-style
standalone MP3 player, or with any car cassette or cassette player to
play your music. Requires SD media card.
Speed Racer Mini R/C Cars - GO Speed Racer GO!
Stage a tiny race to the death with these mini r/c recreations of
classic Speed Racer vehicles. Each features a steering wheel controller
that matches the vehicle. You've got full control to go forward and
reverse and turn left or right... but unfortunately no built in saw
blades, rockets or auto jacks. Charge each car by docking it with the
remote, then race for up to 7 minutes. We thought that Spritle and Chim-
Chim were hiding in the trunk of the Mach 5 but despite our best
efforts the trunk didn't open. Where's Trixie when you need her?
Knives Ready to Join the Circus of Pain
Whether you have a zeal for throwing steel or you're a cutlery
connoisseur, this knife block is just for you. In 1938 the Wheel of
Death introduced the spinning target to knife throwing and decades
later knife throwing still lives on in the modern day sideshow. And it
can live on in your kitchen with the Throwzini Knife Holder. The
Throwzini Knife Holder is made from hand-crafted wood and comes
complete with a set of five stainless steel knives. Each knife is held
securely in its individual protective sheath by magnets.
Nintendo Meets Jack Skellington in Tokyo
Of course we have more nifty Japanese products cherry-picked for your
virtual perusal. The Legend of Zelda Sound Drop Keychains come in six
varieties and each plays a different classic Zelda sound effect. Or
give your desk some added protection with the Super Mario Singing Glow
Star. It flashes and plays the invincibility music from Super Mario.
The Super Mario Glowing Keychains light up your pocket with your
favorite Mario mascots while the 3D laser-etched Nightmare Before Xmas
Glowing Ghosts rise from their tombs. Whew...
Supersized Earbuds - Not for the Lilliputian
Headphones for giants or speakers for you? Through some freakish
laboratory accident, ThinkGeek scientists accidentally embiggen'd a
shipment of iPod earbuds - expanding them to 500 times normal size.
When life gives you citric acid, make a refreshing chilled fruit-
beverage, we always say! These desktop speakers may look like humble
headphones, but the resemblance is merely superficial. These speakers
come with a built-in amplifier and generate up to 3 watts of sound when
cranked to 11. You can always tell people you stole them from a cloud
giant's back pocket. We won't tell.
Star Wars R2-D2 Speaker Set - Use your droid wisely
Since the Star Wars movies R2-D2 seems to have fallen on hard times.
You'd think a successful droid would have an easy time finding work...
but unfortunately due to his speech impediment and close association
with C-3PO he was forced to find work as a pepper grinder, trashcan and
even a laundry basket. Now R2 is trying his hand at audio with this
nifty speaker set. You get a two-droid set, R2-D2 and his red
doppleganger, R2-D1. Each features a flip-up head to reveal a speaker.
Don't you want to help out a droid who's down on his luck?
Get A Free Pink Lava Lamp - Perfect For Mom's Day
Hey folks, Mom's day is creeping up faster than a legion of undead
approaching a cerebellum farm. What does that mean for you? It means
you need to get something for Mom that she might really enjoy. So
please think outside that proverbial three dimensional square thing and
make Mom happy this year with a free pink USB lava lamp! Just spend $25
or more (not including the lava lamp, duh), and use the code MOTHERSHIP
during checkout to redeem. Hurry, Mom's day is May 11th and unlike most
plastic bottles this offer won't last forever.
The latest Action Shot Winner
Submit Your Techie Haiku, Win $50!
Last month's ThinkGeek Techie Haiku Winner is: Gilmore, from Melbourne, Australia!
Here is the winning Haiku:
The next big idea
Will soon sweep across the net
Oh, it just finished.
Wanna win a $50 ThinkGeek gift certificate? Just send us your original
HAIKU and each newsletter we'll select one winner and print his/her HAIKU
right here on the next ThinkGeek newsletter installment for all to see,
plus we'll send you a $50 ThinkGeek gift certificate. Get creative! More
details and rules? Visit:
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