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The ThinkGeek Newsletter!

March 19, 2008

Dearest Journeyers,

You may have noticed that we're normally a pretty irreverent bunch here at ThinkGeek. But news of the passing of Gary Gygax and Arthur C. Clarke has hit us pretty hard and it's a sad time for the monkeys here at Geek Central. Some of us remember coloring in the numbers on our first set of dice, and many of us will forever think of a beautiful rotating space station when hearing The Blue Danube. Each of us would be very different in real life were it not for the contributions these two visionaries made to our fantasy lives. So giant thanks from us here at ThinkGeek to Gary Gygax and Arthur C. Clarke for helping to shape us into the geeks we are today, and as many other folks have already mentioned, we will critically miss you both... and they say that on the other side of this mortal coil "it's full of stars."

Now, roll a 20 or throw a bone in the air for respect, shake off the effects of that #00ff00 ethanol many of you imbibed over the last few days and let us move along...

Phantom Keystroker

Phantom Keystroker

High-Tech Office-Based Prank Device

With the advent of the incessantly beeping and easily concealable Annoy-a-tron, ThinkGeek has ushered in a new era of sophisticated office pranks sure to drive your co-workers bonkers while you snicker silently at your desk. Now the next advanced level in stealthy office-joke electronics is ready for your enjoyment. The Phantom Keystroker may look like a harmless circuit board, but it's actually a devious contraption of unlimited office-based torture.

Can you spot it? Simply discreetly attach the Phantom Keystroker to any extra USB port on your victim's computer, no drivers needed. The Keystroker emulates a keyboard and mouse and periodically makes random mouse movements and types out odd garbage text and phrases. Your hapless co-worker pal will think his computer has been possessed or infected by a destructive virus. As he writhes in anger and furiously dials tech support you can rest easy with a job well done.

Hey! You! Don't you already have the perfect target in mind?

What's New @ ThinkGeek !!

Get A Free Micro-Spy Remote- Great 4/1 Gag!

Get A Free Micro-Spy Remote- Great 4/1 Gag!

Hey folks! Just in time for April Fools Day, you can get this handy micro universal remote - gratis! Imagine the fun you'll have walking in and out of your local sports bars and subtly turning off the big games, or just changing channels. Just be sure that you also pretend to be just as mad as everybody else when it happens. We'll let you figure out how to use it, but the important part is how you get it, and it's simple. Just have at least $25 worth of goodies in your cart (not including the Micro Spy Remote), and type in the code SPORTS during check-out and we'll automagically insert one of these devious little gems into your cart at zero cost. Hurry up though, this offer expires 3/25/2008:

New display technology on your wrist - The E-Ink Watch

LED & LCD watches are so old school. Upgrade to our newest watch that uses E-Ink to enable you to change the look of your watch face with the push of a button. Select from four different dial looks, two different color options, and change from digital time to date display for a total of 16 different display options. E-Ink has an appearance similar to ink on paper and can dynamically invert from black on white or white on black. Plus, power consumption is minimal (with an expected battery life of two years) and has a very wide viewing angle.

New display technology on your wrist - The E-Ink Watch

Camera Sunglasses - Hidden camera with remote control

Camera Sunglasses - Hidden camera with remote control

We all remember seeing those incredible ads for x-ray specs in the back of comic books and some of us probably even mailed in the $3 to a PO Box in New Jersey for rush delivery. "Surprise your friends with amazing x-ray vision" the ads would read. Yeah, someone is going to be surprised but it's not going to be your friends. These camera sunglasses certainly aren't x-ray specs, but they do capture 1.3 megapixel still images (at a resolution of 1280x1024). The included RF remote-control is ideal for easy, stealth-style photo shooting.

Colored Flame Candles - Fire GOOD! Color Fire BETTER!

You've seen artificial candles with LED lights that glow with different colors... hey we sell a few here at ThinkGeek. But how about candles with honest to goodness real fire that burn in green, red or purple? These Colored Flame Candles come in either tea light or oil lamp format and forgo the standard boring yellowish fire color in favor of something a bit more interesting. Right out of a wizard's laboratory (or a high school science class lesson), the candles achieve their special color from a combination of various salts and metals that tint the flame when they burn.

Colored Flame Candles - Fire GOOD! Color Fire BETTER!

Weigh in on the Epic LOLBattle

Weigh in on the Epic LOLBattle

Welcome to the main event. Introducing on your left in the blue corner, weighing in at over 2500 lbs. (our scale broke), out of Fujisawa, Japan, the undisputed heavyweight champion of the world, the lolrus! And on your right in the red corner, weighing in at roughly 100 lbs., from ceilings and monorails everywhere, a... pile of dead LOLcats. Choose your winner. Does the lolrus deserve his bucket or should LOLcats need to kick it? You decide.

KP3 Touchpad Dynamic Effect Sampler - The Mack-Daddy Of Kaos

Have you perused the amazing pocket-size Kaossilator Touchpad Synthesizer and the equally stunning Mini-Kaoss Touchpad Effects Processor but wanted something with a little more musical meat? Well check out the KP3 Touchpad Dynamic Effect Sampler. The KP3 combines features from both the Kaossilator and the Mini-Kaoss Pad in a desktop based format with stunningly cool LED lights underneath the touchpad based control system that follow your finger. What's more you get the ability to sample sounds, use MIDI, and store the whole mess on an SD Card.

KP3 Touchpad Dynamic Effect Sampler - The Mack-Daddy Of Kaos

Star Trek Classic Communicator - Just like Kirk used

Star Trek Classic Communicator - Just like Kirk used

Captain Kirk was known for many things: his bravery, his honor, and his libido. And what did he use to brag about all of those things to his beloved crew? That's right - his Communicator. In the 1960s, the Communicator was unbelievable technology. Now, it pales in comparison to even the most basic of cell phones, but this blast from future's past is still wicked. And this Communicator replica has all the lights and sounds (and voice clips) you'd desire. Call Kirk, Spock, and the gang - or use the super cool hailing feature and have Spock call you. Can you here him now?

PhotoTrackr Pro - Where'd you take that picture?

The famous photographer, Ansel Adams, once said - "We must remember that a photograph can hold just as much as we put into it, and no one has ever approached the full possibilities of the medium." We're not sure if he was speaking about the art-form, or the technical aspect of photography, but the PhotoTrackr Pro is an addition to the technical side. Geotagging adds longitude and latitude coordinates to your photos by tracking wherever you are when you press the shutter on your digital camera. The included Windows software uses Google maps to plot your path as well as mark where each picture was taken.

PhotoTrackr Pro - Where'd you take that picture?

Molecular Model Kit - Build a big model of a tiny thing

Molecular Model Kit - Build a big model of a tiny thing

Molecules are some of our favorite things. When we eat, we love the capsaicin molecule. When we drink, we love the caffeine molecule. When we drink hard, we love the ethanol molecule. And when we have gas, the methane molecule is king. Molecules are also fun to build, which is why we bring you this Molecular Model Kit. Now you can build models of your favorite molecules in the comfort of your own home or office. You will also learn how many bonds different atoms have and stuff. But forget all that learning crap. The important thing is that the ethanol molecule looks like a doggie.

Dough Nu Matic - Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do?

Doughnuts are perhaps the world's most perfect food. Those round nuggets of deep-fried-joy just call out to our most deepest culinary desires. It's a dark place, full of magic, mystery, and cholesterol. Food snobs say doughnuts are bad for your heart, but it's our totally unscientific opinion that doughnuts give our hearts extra exercise, so how could that be bad, right? Oh, well, we tried anyway. The truth is, everything in moderation, and that has to include doughnuts. Here's a simple way to make dozens and dozens of doughnuts with very little effort. Mix the batter, fill the oil reservoir, and turn it on. Before too long, you'll be stuffing your face full of dozens of tiny donuts!

Dough Nu Matic - Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do?

Star Wars DIY Force FX Lightsaber Kit - Jedi must build their own

Star Wars DIY Force FX Lightsaber Kit - Jedi must build their own

Lightsaber construction can be fun - unless you sell them, unlicensed, on the internet, and Darth Lucas and his L'Awyers go after you. But if you are just making a respectable weapon for yourself, nothing can be more rewarding. Finding all the right parts, however, can be costly (Adegan crystals don't come cheap). Don't worry though, this kit has everything. The core unit has a triple crystal (so you can switch between red, green, and blue blades), and all the pieces you need to make a custom saber. And you can change the form again and again - just in case you can't decide between the Light and the Dark Side.

Officially-Licensed Shirt Asplosion

This time around we have six new shirts from some of our favorite television and movie obsessions, including more Princess Bride, Firefly / Serenity, Futurama, and the Family Guy / Star Wars mashup. Our xx- chromosome contingency will be happy to hear that 3 of these new shirts are cut for females. But guys, never fear. You still have the other half to choose from. Check them all out. Now.

Officially-Licensed Shirt Asplosion

GX-10 Interactive Gaming System - Video games you really get into

GX-10 Interactive Gaming System - Video games you really get into

Sure, you've got a webcam - just bout everybody does, but can your webcam help you play video games? We're sure you've seen those console systems with the interactive games that work with your video camera, but who needs a new console system just for that? This little webcam comes with its own interactive games and works on your Windows XP or Vista computer. Fend off hordes of attacking ninjas, guide the fox through the spikey dungeon, and shoot down the alien invaders. It's seriously addictive - just check out the video after the link and watch our monkey flail around. No, he's not having a fit, he's having FUN!

Survival Kit in a Sardine Can - Sardines not included

Okay, so it might not be as much fun as a barrel stuffed with monkeys (and trust us, that's pretty fun) - but this sardine can full of survival goodies will come in quite handy. Instead of smelly, oily little fish, this tin has been carefully packed with emergency medical supplies, nourishment, navigation aids and more. Put one in your car, boat, motorcycle, fishing vest, backpack, laptop bag, bike, and emergency kit - and you'll always be the most well-prepared monkey in the barrel.

 Survival Kit in a Sardine Can - Sardines not included

Quick Blurbs !!

We're hiring again! Custom Product Specialist, take a gander...

Matrix Cube Alarm Clock

Matrix LED Alarm Clock - Sleek, stackable LED Bling...

Periodic Table of the Elements

Periodic Table of Elements Poster - Chart the elements

EZ Commander Trackball Remote

EZ Commander Trackball Remote - Perfect For Your Living Room PC

USB Desk Assortment and Gift Set

USB Desktop Gift Assortment - True Multi-tasker

Aluminum Laptop Briefcase

Aluminum Laptop Briefcase - Roomy Metal Case at a Great Price

Dual Bay SATA Hot Swap JBOD Enclosure

Dual Bay SATA Hot Swap JBOD Enclosure - Turn Two Drives Into One

Plush Mario Sound Bops Series 2

Plush Mario Sound Bops Series 2 - Bop these Plushies


Chargepod - One charger to rule them all


Stikfas - New Flavor: Musketeer

DIY Drinking Strawz

DIY Strawz - 2 Sets for $14.99 for a limited time!

Office Monkeys Playset

Office Monkey Playset - Just like a real office

Broken Image Necklace

Broken Image Necklace -- Never an Error as an Accessory

Giant Mario Plush Action Figure

Giant Mario Plush Action Figure - Cuddly and Posable Mario

Plastic Surgeon Package Opener

Plastic Surgeon Package Opener

Metallic Video Watch with OLED Screen

Metallic Video Watch with OLED Screen - Back in Stock

Pogo iPhone Stylus

Pogo iPhone Stylus - Specially Designed for the iPhone Screen

R/C Airsoft Battle Tanks

R/C Airsoft Battle Tanks - Now Back in Stock

Palmsize Battle Tanks

Palmsize Battle Tanks - Now Back in Stock

Airsoft Submachine Gun with Laser Sight

Airsoft Submachine Gun with Laser Sight - Now Back in Stock

ThinkGeek Remembers Arthur C. Clarke - Author, Inventor, and Futurist

ThinkGeek Remembers Gary Gygax - Lord of RPG

The Latest Action Shot Winner

The Latest Action Shot Winner: Mana Energy Potion Totem Office Worship

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The Latest Action Shot Winner
Techie Haiku Winner!

Submit Your Techie Haiku, Win $50!

Last month's ThinkGeek Techie Haiku Winner is: Eric, from Lincoln, Nebraska!
Here is the winning Haiku:

    Net Neutrality
    Keep the Man off my bandwidth
    Don't throttle me, bro.

Wanna win a $50 ThinkGeek gift certificate? Just send us your original HAIKU and each newsletter we'll select one winner and print his/her HAIKU right here on the next ThinkGeek newsletter installment for all to see, plus we'll send you a $50 ThinkGeek gift certificate. Get creative! More details and rules? Visit:


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