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The ThinkGeek Newsletter!
October 25, 2007
This past Tuesday was a very important day for geek kind. No, Pluto
was not accepted back into the realm of the nine. The actual
Lightsaber used by Luke Skywalker in Episode VI was launched into space
alongside the Harmony space module aboard STS 120; otherwise known as
the Shuttle Discovery. Woohoo! Our only gripe was that Jar Jar wasn't
launched along with it to test the theory that Gungans can't be
successfully ejected from airlocks without spacesuits. And why didn't
the Lightsaber from Episode V travel instead? We blame the Ewoks, as
should you. Speaking of you, now is the time where we humbly ask that
you send an impulse from your retinal sensors down those optic tracks
and on to your occipital lobe, thus allowing you to successfully
scroll down and focus on the following fresh goodies...
Wi-Fi Detector Shirt
Wearable Wi-Fi Signal Status for You and the World
Here at ThinkGeek we're pretty lazy when it comes to technology. We
expect our gadgets to do all the busywork while we focus on the high
level important tasks like reading blogs. That's why we hate to have to
crack open our laptops just to see if there is any wi-fi internet
access about... But now, thanks to the ingenious ThinkGeek robot
monkeys, you can display the current wi-fi signal strength to yourself
and everyone around you with this stylish Wi-Fi Detector Shirt. The
glowing bars on the front of the shirt dynamically change as the
surrounding wi-fi signal strength fluctuates. Finally you can get the
attention you deserve as others bow to you as their reverential wi-fi
god, while geeky admirers swoon at your presence. You can thank us
later. And hey, this shirt will be featured in the exclusive Holiday
2008 Wired Showroom in downtown Soho, New York. Woohoo! We are pretty
Check-out the one-of-a-kind ThinkGeek Wi-Fi Detecting Shirt right here:
What's New @ ThinkGeek !!
The World's First Intelligent Umbrella
Never forget your umbrella again. Reminiscent of a warrior's special
weapon, the Ambient Forecasting Umbrella flashes its blue LEDs to warn
you that rain might be nearby. It wirelessly receives local weather
data from Accuweather.com and delivers it to your umbrella via a
nationwide paging network. Lights indicate rain, drizzle, snow and
thunderstorms so you can bring the umbrella with you and know what to
expect. This is a top quality "gust buster" umbrella canopy design
with a simple push button opening action. So, come rain or shine -
this intelligent umbrella has you covered!
DIY Laptop Sleeves
ThinkGeek is always looking for solutions to problems. The latest issue
that's gripping the artistic geeks around the world is the lack of
artistic expression in laptop sleeves. It's a scourge the world around!
Yes, matte black can say a lot about someone (nihilistic but cheap), as
can stainless steel briefcases (spy wannabe) but if you're the type
that looks at your portable-computer conveyance as a blank canvas
waiting the artist's touch, then you need to RUN NOT WALK to your
computer and order a DIY Laptop Sleeve. Plain white canvas will take
markers, pencil, oils or even watercolors - you're limited only by your
imagination. Email your creations to firstname.lastname@example.org, and you
might even find immortality for your works!
Five New Shirts for Your Geek Wardrobe Needs
We have new shirts that run the geek gamut, from the smallest to the
largest. The Geekling creeper is for babies who secretly ponder how to
take apart their mobiles and rewire them to control their baby
monitors. For those who can't hold their heads up yet but are already
indifferent about the whole situation, "meh" now comes in an infant
tee. For the adult-sized geeks, old-school RPG fans will understand the
new design "The Dice Are Trying to Kill Me." Our next shirt, "Your
Ringtone Sucks," allows you to express the truth to multiple targets at
once. Think of it as both a t-shirt and a broadcast message. Finally,
we have something special for the ladies. For every one of our new Huge
Tracts of Land shirts we sell in October, we'll donate $1 to Susan G.
Komen for the Cure. Because we're all about protecting the land.
USB Cassette Deck - Give Your Audio Cassettes Some Digital Lovin'
You may be familiar with our Ion USB Turntable... the handy little
gadget that lets you take your old vinyl records and encode them
digitally into MP3 files. Apparently your unloved audio cassettes were
pretty depressed that no shiny new tech was helping them make the
immortal leap to digital. So sad :( ... Well fear not little cassettes!
ThinkGeek has come to your rescue with the USB Cassette Deck. Not only
does this cool bit of kit sound smashing when you connect its dual
cassettes to your stereo system, but also by using the included
software and your PC you can easily rip your audio cassettes into
digital format for playback on iPod or copying to CD.
World of Warcraft - Amazing Action figures from Azeroth!
Very rarely do enemies team up, and when they do unexpected things can
happen. Three of Azeroth's baddies teamed up with a dwarf of the
Alliance to do the physically impossible. Using magic only available in
a future expansion pack, the four characters broke through the computer
and emerged into the real world. They were going to head to Blizzard
and take over Azeroth. But alas, their plan backfired. They emerged,
true, but they emerged as plastic action figures. And then they began
duplicating. Bring a set into your home now or else all the duplicates
might be able to band together and take over the world. And you don't
want that do you? Besides, they look awesome and are great fun to play
with - for all those times when you can't get online.
Doctor Who RC Invasion - Daleks and K9 and Cybermen, oh my.
Doctor Who's Sonic Screwdriver is a great tool. But we know of another
great tool - the remote control! With a remote control unit, you're
able to harness the 1/4 scale K9 unit and get it to drive around your
office, talk, and even extend and fire his laser gun. K9 is so
obedient, you'll definitely want to make sure he's by your side in
battle. And with different remote controls, you can command small
Battling Daleks to fight each other using invisible "Dalek Rays." If
you score 5 hits before your opponent - you win! And to referee the
Dalek Battle, you'll also get a swanky Cyberman figure. So break out
some batteries, gather your Doctor Who buddies, and have some of the
wildest R/C action this side of Gallifrey.
Radiometer - Classic Retro Toy Still Perplexes
It's a simple solar engine that spins when light is shone on it. But
what makes it spin? Is it pressure photons place on the dark side? Is
it the surface of the blades sublimating that imparts spin? Maybe it's
the complex dance of the rarefied warm and cool air? Or is it spinning
with some mystical all-powerful force that controls everything? Look,
we've flown from one side of the galaxy to the other, and we've seen a
lot of weird stuff, but if you think you got the science, then maybe
you can pick up the ThinkGeek radiometer and explain it. 3 inches in
diameter, this little glass bulb will bring out the science geek in
everyone. Pretty soon, you'll be shining flashlights on it, holding up
mirrors, sticking it in the freezer and blowing it with hairdryers
trying to understand the complex mechanisms at play here.
Shooting Cubicle Alarm System - Protect your stapler!
Cue the Pink Panther theme. Ahead of you, in your coworker's cubicle is
a delicious piece of chocolate cake. He gets up and goes to the
bathroom - you have only moments if you want to swipe it without
getting caught. You tiptoe into the cubicle and then all heck breaks
loose. An alarm klaxon pierces the calm. You press on, but little do
you know that tripping alarm 1 armed two more alarms. You hurry to the
desk and alarm 2 goes off, louder than alarm 1 and illuminating you
with a red dot of light. You turn and trip alarm 3, which fires two
foam-tipped missiles at your head. The only thing you manage to sneak
away with is a lesson: get a Shooting Cubicle Alarms system for your
cube, and protect your own goodies from office hooligans.
KeyCarbon - Advanced Keystroke Logger
George Carlin once said a paranoid need only be right once for it to be
all worthwhile. Maybe you've got enemies, or maybe you just want to
keep an eye on someone. Frankly, we don't care! All we can do is
provide you with the tools you need, and it's up to you to act
responsibly. If anybody asks, we didn't see you... That said, if
you've got a need to record the keystrokes of a USB keyboard, then the
KeyCarbon is here to help. Capable of recording over half a million
keystrokes, you can capture anything that gets typed into a USB
keyboard. Tiny and easily overlooked, the KeyCarbon remains hidden
while secretly and faithfully making a carbon-copy of whatever is
typed. Used by computer forensics departments around the world,
KeyCarbon is sneaky-sneaky!
Giant Swiss Army Knife
In the ThinkGeek Gadgets Hall of Fame, this is a knife that would
definitely score an entry. The Giant Swiss Army Knife is a unique
special-edition knife containing all 85 tools currently produced by
Wenger (Maker of the Genuine Swiss Army Knife). These 85 tools can be
used in over 100 functions, and it's the World's Largest Swiss Army
Knife. It's not exactly going to win any awards for lightest, smallest
or most efficient tool but it is guaranteed to impress anyone who gazes
upon it. And even though this knife is a monster, weighing almost 3
pounds, don't worry - it does have a key ring so you can carry it on a
belt loop. Comes with official Wenger gift box and certificate.
Palmsize Battle Tanks - Petite Tanks Mean Serious Business
Office disputes here at ThinkGeek are handled in a most diplomatic
manner. As standard procedure, the offending parties are teleported to
the surface of Vulcan where they duel to the death to resolve their
differences. However due to the high employee turnover rate we have
revised the policy to declare a victor based on Palmsize Battle Tank
warfare. These detailed diminutive r/c tanks feature authentic tank
sounds and IR based "laser tag" action with realistic recoil. A hit
momentarily disables your opponent. Get enough hits and take control of
your enemy's tank. Each set contains two-tanks, but buy an extra set
and up to four tanks can battle at once to solve those more complicated
Vector Desk Shelf - Perfect for the Middle Level Manager
Brought to you by the Art Lebedev Russian design studio best known for
the fabled Optimus Maxiumus keyboard comes the unabashedly low-tech
Vector Desk Shelf. The Vector is modeled after a line graph of
something.... Your current performance as an employee perhaps? Or maybe
the rate at which donuts are consumed by accounting? In any case you
can use Vector's acute angles to store a myriad of desktop goodies. By
a simple rotation you can be in the green, optimistically trending up,
or in the red... realistically on the decline. We've decided our Vector
shelf tracks the overall sales trend of Vector shelves as it relates to
cleverly written product descriptions like this one.
Submit Your Techie Haiku, Win $50!
Last month's ThinkGeek Techie Haiku Winner is: Alex, from Melbourne, Australia!
Here is the winning Haiku*:
There once was a boy with mind quick
And ThinkGeek dot com he did trick.
They expected to find,
Haikus in a line.
What they got instead was a lim'rick
* OK, so Alex didn't exactly send us a Haiku. However we were impressed
with his courage and so decided to make an exception just this once.
Repeat, just this once ;) If we decide to start a techie Limerick
contest in addition to this one, you'll be the first to know!
Wanna win a $50 ThinkGeek gift certificate? Just send us your original
HAIKU and each newsletter we'll select one winner and print his/her HAIKU
right here on the next ThinkGeek newsletter installment for all to see,
plus we'll send you a $50 ThinkGeek gift certificate. Get creative! More
details and rules? Visit:
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