That raised brow either means a hug is going to happen, or he's about to shoot you. We suspect the latter here.
With the holiday season fast upon us, we know that lots of folks are going to contact our CS Monkeys for advice and with questions. We thought that you might want to get to know them a little. Put a face to the voice. A personality to the name in chat. So we whipped up a few deeply revealing interview questions, picked a "willing" participant and snapped some pictures for you.
Our first victim is Jimmy (aka JimJam). You might know him from such films as Portable Laundry Pod and Fridgeezoo and such images as Tribbles and Bits.
Our insightful interview:
Optimus Prime or Jean-Luc Picard. Who would be the best boss?
The leaderships styles seem to be both 'lead by example' which I
really respect so I started thinking which day to day job would be the
most fun. Sidekick to giant fighting robots that turn into awesome
cars that can drive me places, or part of an elite team of
intelligent, highly motivated people who explore the galaxy? Then I
realized I'd totally get redshirted in either situation so it comes
down to which job will afford the more incredible death. Do I want my
afterlife to be an eternity of explaining "Yeah, some random plant
killed me on this class M planet, but it was okay because that allowed
the main cast to know what not to do," or do I want to say, "A GIANT
ROBOT SMASHED ME. IT WAS AWESOME BECAUSE RIGHT AFTER IT TURNED INTO A
GIANT TANK AND WAS BLOWN UP BY A ROBOT THAT TURNED INTO A JET THEN
BACK INTO A ROBOT. THEN IT STARTED DANCING TO A WEIRD AL SONG."
What was your strangest/best experience at ThinkGeek HQ? Keep it
work safe! (Aw.)
I always love giving tours. I feel all important and stuff and it
gives me a chance to be the center of attention which I love. But I
have to give special recognition to something that happened when we
went on an officially unofficial ThinkGeek trip to Comic Con
Baltimore. A kid recognized me from the catalog. I felt like a
celebrity. It may have been my awesome Space Marine gear, but he
wanted to take a photo with me, the goofy guy from the catalog. It was
Star Trek, Star Wars, Firefly, or Battlestar Galactica? Pick one and
This... is a most difficult question. When I was a kid, I would have
said Star Wars, since that was my obsession until they killed off
Chewbacca in one of the books. (Not a spoiler; he had an obituary in
the Washington Post.) I played TIE Figher on my parent's old Gateway
PC. (You remember Gateway computers? They came in cow boxes. How
droll!) To this day it is still one of my favorite games. At the time I hadn't watched any Star Trek, Firefly, or Battlestar
Galactica, because Star Wars was all I needed. So for nostalgia's sake
I'll say Star Wars, but if you haven't seen Firefly, or the new BSG,
please do! But don't finish the BSG series fully. It will just make
you a sad panda. I will not say Star Trek because TOS just gets
so... weird in the third season (Bones! They... stoleSpock'sbrain!) but the first two seasons
were pretty awesome. I guess my point is don't let your love of one
fandom keep you from any other. You just lose out if you play the 'my
fandom is better than your fandom' game.
Seriously though, get your hands on TIE Fighter. That game is AWESOME.
What's your favorite thing of all the things we sell? Why?
My favorite thing changes daily. When I was marathoning my way
through BSG I wanted all of our BSG things like the Viper Wall cling
to the notebooks we just started carrying. I really want the Minecraft
hoodie as that is my current obsession. Also, we need more TF2 stuff.
If I had to pick one item from our site to have in my cube tomorrow
though, it would be the Nerf Maverick. It has accuracy and range that
I haven't gotten from any other Nerf Gun right out of the box.
How did you end up working at ThinkGeek?
I found a Craigslist posting for ThinkGeek Customer service temp. I
came on in the fall of 2009 and have been in CS ever since. I became
the go-to guy for product questions due to my enthusiasm for playing
with all of the crazy stuff we have.
What's your favorite part of your workday as a CS Monkey?
Right now, I'm doing what is called floor walking. I go from person to
person with our new seasonal customer service agents and answer any
questions they have. This is very fun and I get to use my 2 years of
working here to help out other people. Also, I get to do it with a
Nerf Longshot strapped across my back, so that is kind of awesome. How
many people get to walk around their office helping coworkers (which
gives that warm fuzzy feeling) and shooting them when appropriately
funny? It is probably, like, 3 people.
Sharks with lasers on their heads, or raptors wielding lightsabers?
Assuming you mean as animals to attack those that oppose me, I'll say
raptors (assuming you mean the raptors from Jurassic Park and not the
foot-and-a-half animals they really were). We aren't very close to the
ocean, so I'd just have some big dead fish with lasers on their heads
rotting on the ground, so I guess you could make some seared shark
sushi pretty quickly, but still, you really can't beat raptor army.
Plus, the raptors would probably realize they don't need lightsabers
to be deadly and I'd be all like, "Hey raptor, why don't you let me
hang onto that for you because you are already so deadly?" and the
raptor would be all like "ROOOARRR" and tear me in half and eat my
entrails because YOU CANNOT TRAIN A RAPTOR TO BE YOUR FRIENDLY
LIGHTSABER WIELDING FRIEND. Raptors don't want to be fed--they want to
hunt. Me. Because I'm out of shape and tubby so they don't have to
work hard for a big meal.
Seriously though, raptors probably wouldn't be able to hold the sabers
well so it would probably just be a bunch of terrified animals all
like "WHAT ARE THESE BURNING LIGHT THINGS TIED TO MY ARMS?
ROAAAARRRRR." I know raptors eat people, but that would be really
mean. What kind of person came up with these questions?
What's the weirdest conversation you've ever had with a customer?
This story requires some background. I am a marching band geek. I
marched baritone and euphonium in high school (fun fact: my HS mascot
was the Atoms), again in College (GO THE BULLET), and I have gone pro
and now march for a certain professional sports team (go... team
that is in this area but I may not be allowed to say the name without
paying the NFL, ESPN, and like 29 other organizations). As such, I've
always been looking for a chance to play one of my horns in a video.
We finally made a video where I was playing my euphonium and a
customer who saw it and called me up just so we could geek out about
euphoniums for 15 minutes. Turns out she was this awesome badass
euphonium player at this huge conference. And I was in total awe of
her coolness. For the record for any other euphonium and baritone
players out there, I play a 4 valve compensating Besson Sovereign and
I march a King 1124.
I just got a bit of a high from typing about marching band and
euphoniums. For real.
Isn't he stunningly charismatic? We think so. This is why he was the obvious first choice for this dangerous social experiment.
We're done with Jimmy (for now) but we're not done with the experiment. Stay tuned, because next week we'll interview Dave. He's only a little undead, promise.