We really hope our shipping invoices aren't the most exciting part of receiving your ThinkGeek loot. If you don't shove it out of the way while ripping through the box to get at the good stuff, we're doing something wrong. But next time, you may want to pause and take a look at our shiny new invoice.
First of all, there is a Timmy, and everyone loves Timmy. (You do, right? Don't tell us the MindControl Ray XLT3200 needs more tweaking.) There might also be a little coupon code on there, too, so look for that.
And starting very soon, you'll be subjected--er, treated--to nonsense contributed by your fellow geeks.
See, there's this big spot on the invoice for "notes." We don't really have anything to "note" there, unless you really want to know what we had for lunch and our opinion on Duke Nukem Forever, which are, respectively, grilled cheese and "ZOMG FINALLY!!"
- "Thank you for your sudden but inevitable purchase." by Lindsay A.
- "Not responsible for non-Euclidean artifacts in packing." by Cat B.
- "Please keep your phalanges, tubercles, processes, prominences, and other such extremities inside the vehicle at all times until we have passed FULLY through the event horizon." by Becca B.
- "PC LOAD LETTER" by Eric C.
- "Ceci n'est pas une invoice." by @the_anastasia
- "Many Bothans died to bring you this merchandise." by Josh L. (and, like, 30 others but it's still so good)
- "2 by 2, hands of blue, we smuggled this past the alliance, just for you." by @elalona
- "Don't forget your towel." by @keithtyrrell
- "Invoices now made from 100% Ent-free paper." by @JFMathews
- "No swallows (African or European) were harmed in the delivery of this shipment." by @russiameg
- "Some contents may have shifted in the TARDIS ride. Any Daleks found are not the responsibility of ThinkGeek or Timmy." by @BleedingSweat
- "Ladies, look at your man. Now back at Timmy. Now sadly your man is not Timmy, however with this merchandise he can look as nerdy as Timmy. Look down, back up. Where are we? We're on Serenity with the Timmy your man could be as nerdy as. What's in my hand? Two tickets to Comic Con. Look again, the tickets are now Galleons. Anything is possible when your man is as nerdy as Timmy." by Brian R.
...and there were tons more, so if you don't see yourself in this post, do not despair. There's still a really good chance you were one of the oodles chosen for printing.
We hope you'll enjoy the ridiculousness as much as we enjoyed reading all 1,400 of them, checking for typos and cussin' and naughty thoughts. Thanks, internet chuckleheads!